by Bill on October 27, 2011

Søren Kierkegaard… feared that the advent of the camera would create one single portrait of us all, obliterating the treasure of our differences. Hayward being a worldly flâneur would seem to take issue with the eminent Dane. – Richard Merkin, Vanity Fair


asphalt, muscle & bone – The Fat River Hotel – Room #31

©bill hayward


asphalt, muscle & bone – The Fat River Hotel – Room #31

©bill hayward

distances, boundaries, time stretching out…rethread  dreams…

(music out)


spacer_quarterinch I’m an object. An object dirty with blood. That creates other objects…

                                                                                                     Clarice Lispector, Agua Viva

spacer_quarterinch                                                            spacer_quarterinchNight Blood – “Only in Bed ” – (some adjustments midst life and death)


It is the best of times, it is the worst of times…

spacer_quarterinchIt is the time of fulfillment, frenzy, dragon smoke and sex.

Of love, Asphalt and astonishment


A cinema of mud and Bone


It is the time of Night Blood…


In the great elastic performance chambers of arterial Muscle, the

restless heart gathers blood unto itself,

a nocturnal nourishment sticky with stories,

desire and truth, creation and death,

a tangle of labored roots.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         There are invisibles, objects, shades and shadows, snakes and heights, a fumble of

bodies.  Random reports of gasoline angels, rust, fear and elusive paint, demons,

electric scatter and temporary soot. Vaginal salts and brackish memory, sperm and

sand. Blue dread, water, forests and -




- always out of reach.



asphalt, muscle & bone – The Fat River Hotel – Room 42

©bill hayward 2014





Night Blood – “Only in Bed”

by Bill on June 4, 2014



Lainie Love Dalby

The Museum of Emotions

by Bill on April 29, 2014

Excerpt from asphalt, muscle & bone – the museum of emotions


Leon Golub – artist


SophieFlack©billhaywardSophie Flack – NYC Ballet



Robert LaFosse – NYC Ballet

As if life were shaven,
And fitted to a frame,
And could not breathe without a key
And ’twas like Midnight, some—
When everything that ticked – has
And Space stares all around -

c. 1862 Emily Dickinson “It was not Death, for I stood up…”spacer-1inch

Swarming Sensation

Fracturing The Fascism of the Frame


1. The entire “portrait of the collaborative-self” process is predicated on
possibility and the play of the unconscious mind.

2. Permission. The “portrait of the collaborative-self” portrait process/
experience is about allowing one to reclaim the authority of one’s
imagination. Imagination being the only source of real freedom we possess.spacer-1inch3. These images are created/built/painted/constructed out of open ended
conversation between myself and the subject…possibility. These images are
built out of the play of imagination in and with paint and/or paper. All of
the marks are made by the subject…their art, their heart.

4. These images are built of imagination and possibility, and traditional
framing kills-off and flattens imagination and possibility.spacer-1inch5. Imagination and play are active…..framing is “life shaven” – the absence
of breath.spacer-1inch6. Framing is essentially a lie…where ever it is found. Framing is fascism
of the conscious mind at 90 degree angles.


The Swarm

Our eye, insatiable and in heat. – Gauguin

7.  To escape and avoid the violence of “definition” that is the frame, I have
continued with honoring possibility and the play of the “paint and paper” by
“swarming” layers of paint, paper and line to the image such that the final
presentation becomes sculptural. The work now exists in three dimensional
space and is not flattened to the wall. This re-animation of the work allows for
unlimited configuration of the entire work…both physically and in the scanning
eye of the viewer.spacer-1inch8.  This is more active seeing…the presentation does not predict or profess any
answer or one way of “seeing”. Lifted from the tyranny of the wall, these images
come with their own oxygen supply and ventilation. The tactile participation of
depth. The eye alive…heat, rhythm and sensation dancing in the shadows.spacer-1inch9.  By confounding “edge”, this assemblage (sculptural) of presentation
acknowledges/stimulates the space outside the image as well as the image itself.
Sometimes external line crosses and invades the image space. No hierarchy. The
eye is kept active. Mystery is courted. Stuff is going on. Some of the images have
been torn and taped and painted into. There are pulleys and ropes. The delicate,
unstable “clip” of paper and print also acknowledges mutability.spacer-1inch10.  Nothing is hemmed in by explicit measurement….there are variable
dimensions that are textural as well as visual. 2D and 3D. The entire work stays in
touch with possible participation, enchantment and heart.spacer-1inch11.  These works animate the viewing experience/participation in one additional,
very inter-active way. There is no way one looks at these images and does not stop
to wonder; “given the paint, paper and permission,………….what would I do?”spacer-1inch
Given enough paint, paper and permission, there’s no telling where we might end up. – bill hayward
©bill hayward – NYC 2013


melinda©billhaywardMelinda Roy – NYC Ballet

bill hayward’s “the human bible”…an evocative and compelling mix of

deeply personal communication and portraiture”  – Geoff Gehman